excessive depression

My feelings for everything has gone...drove by myself...listening to loud music in the car...my heart was like stop beating...so calm..so calm...brains are empty...i sped a little...wish to get home as soon as possible...i know that my 'good old friend' came to find me...know this 'friend' since i was f3...okok...the 'friend' i am refering was my 'depression syndrome'...perhaps these days im locking myself up at home...i wish i can stop using my brain to think...it makes me suffer quite a lot...going to RIP soon..